Running Friends Are The Best Friends

Does running alone give you more motivation, or do the benefits of buddying up outweigh that? While only a third of UK runners train with a partner, 87% of us believe it actually helps our motivation according to a recent poll by Wellness brand fourfive. As someone who has found running friends in three continents and two American states over the past few years, I’m with the 87% – one hundred percent.

I’ve been a runner for over thirty years. I started running with my dad in my late teens, but mostly, up until six years ago I was a lone runner – a happy one. One of the main reasons the sport has been a constant for most of my life, is that I love it. Running for me is joy, catharsis, a release, something to be proud of, a way to understand struggle and to learn to live with it, and as the London marathon approaches on Sunday I know thousands will feel the same as me.

So back then, running alone was fine. Until I didn’t.

The big change happened for me when I came back to the UK after three years of living in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. I’d been running there – always (looking back now, probably dangerously) alone and always before the sun came up. When I moved back, I needed to find ways to reconnect with home, so I engaged with the team who put together the local fun run. This snowballed into a group of people eager to set up a running club. I had no experience of such things. I was a regular runner, but always saw clubs as something for the ‘real’ runners.

Being part of the team that started one was pivotal to removing this imposter syndrome. The team that put our club together put inclusivity at its heart. From the beginning, the club’s slogan was ‘no runner left behind’. We drew members who could run sub-three-hour marathons alongside people who couldn’t care less about pace and times. Members volunteered to lead beginner’s courses culminating in a 5K parkrun. It was joyful.

For me personally, that is where my running game changed. At the time I was 45 with two little kids. I’d run one marathon in 2007 (without a running watch or tech t-shirt), I could run a half marathon in just under two hours and saw running as something lovely for my physical and mental health. I assumed that would be my running life till death but no.  When I found my running friends, I truly found running.

Changes for me happened quickly. I started going to the club’s group training sessions and did speedwork for the first time. I would’ve been daunted by this before, but the fact of the matter is, group training is one of the most accessible and effective ways of running with others. Unlike long runs, speed training usually takes place over a short distance, on a track or a loop and is mostly circular. Exertion is short followed by recoveries. It’s impossible to get left behind on a loop.

The benefits of this were two-fold – without realising it, I was getting faster, and I was finding some of the most amazing friends.

Alongside the speedwork, our club had long Sunday group runs. Based in North Hampshire, we were lucky to have miles of beautiful countryside around us. Getting up early on a Sunday to run across fields, laugh and chat was never hard to do.

About six months after the club started, we attended our local half marathon together. By this time, we all had club t-shirts. We gathered at the start proudly as a club – supporting each other, pinning bibs, talking strategy and probably best of all, planning to meet in the local pub later. I knew my running had improved, but I had no idea how much.

Whilst nervously hanging around this start line, one of the faster runners kindly agreed to pace me. We agreed a stretch goal of 1hr 50 minutes, and I was terrified of this. I truly didn’t believe it was possible, but these people made me want to try. My pacer stayed by my side the whole 13.1 miles, talking in a soft voice, telling me I was doing good, but sparing any details that might derail me – for most of that race I only had a vague idea how I was running. At mile 10 we passed a spot where a group of club members who were not running the race and their families were cheering. How can you slow down when friends are shouting your name and a pub is waiting?

I passed the finish line of that race in 1hr 46 minutes. A half marathon personal best by about 10 minutes. I’ve since gone on to take another four off that. I qualified for the Boston marathon and now have a sub-22-minute 5K. I’m 50 and I hope I’m not done.

It changes everything when you run with friends.