There simply aren’t enough hours in the day. What with work, catching up with friends, the gym, shopping, cooking and relaxing, sometime it’s our nearest and dearest who gets put to the end of the list.
When life is busy, couples can get a little out of sync with each other. But rather than moan at each other and merely accept that you are tired and life is demanding, why not indulge your senses and see if you can’t reconnect and recapture some of the magic between the sheets.
Your five senses can be very powerful for changing moods so here we suggest a few simple things for firing up the senses to ensure that your focus is on each other.
• Quick clean up: If the laundry is scattered around the flat and the dirty dishes from last night’s meal are still clogging up the sink, it may be hard to unwind and feel ready to get intimate (especially for the woman). Take 15 minutes to stack the dishwasher and collect the mess – it doesn’t have to be perfect but it will mean you can forget about it!
• Candlelight: everything looks better under the soft flicker of candlelight. Scatter candles around the living room and bedroom and turn the lights off. But don’t forget to blow them out before you go to sleep. There is nothing like a fire to spoil a mood!
• Dressing up: making an effort with what you wear doesn’t just have to be for going out. When you feel glamorous, it raises your confidence and your partner feels like you did it just for him!
• Music: this is not the time for your favourite thrash band, instead look for the dulcet tones of Frank Sinatra, Billie Holiday, Madeleine Peyroux or Gwyneth Herbert to create the best background atmosphere.
• whisper sweet nothings: keep your voice soft and low, even when discussing mundane things like your day – it helps create the right tone for the evening.
• soft and sensuous fabrics: fabrics such as cashmere, silk and satin are soft to the touch and beg to be felt.
• good quality bed linen: There is nothing like soft bed sheets to help you feel sexy. If you have time before the big night, go out and buy bed linen with a high thread count. If not, make sure you put freshly laundered sheets onto the bed in preparation!
• defuzz and moisturise: make skin touchably smooth by getting waxed or shaving. Then drench skin in moisturiser to ensure that he can’t keep his hands off you.
• forgo hair products: although your hair might look a little flatter than usual it will be so strokeabley clean and soft he won’t be able to stop his fingers from playing with your luscious locks.
• limit your carbs: Carbs make you feel bloated and tired, not what you are aiming for on a romantic evening. Choose a protein rich meal with vegetables that beg to be hand fed to your partner.
• limit alcohol: while some alcohol loosens you up, too much can completely ruin the mood and your libido. Keep it to a couple of glasses of good wine or champagne.
• powerhouse aphrodisiac foods: Oysters, asparagus, chocolate, avocado and nuts are amongst foods that help to raise blood flow, energy and hormone levels so don’t forget to include some in your evening meal.
• scented candles: relaxing yet heady scents to get you in the mood include rose, jasmine, vanilla and geranium. Try them out and decide which one you and your partner prefer.
• linen spray: co-ordinate with the scented candles for a harmonious scent in bed however if you feel you are both on the sleepy side, you can pep up your mood with a spritz of peppermint or mandarin.
• don’t wear scent: both try not to wear perfume or aftershave so that your partner can really smell you and you him.
Now if only we can find the time to schedule a date night once a month!
[picture credits: © Yoyo1972; www.sxc.hu; Or Hiltch]