In London there are millions of single people, most of who are looking for love. However when you see all your friends pair up leaving you on the sidelines, it can get you down and leave you wondering why you can’t find love. Dawn Cummins, author of Message of Love (£10.99, Panoma Press), says that not believing you are worthy of love can be stopping you getting the love you deserve.
“Everyone is worthy of love. I also feel the relationship you have with yourself is the answer to having a loving relationship with another. It is when you start taking responsibility for yourself and your life that will probably be the most powerful relationship you will ever have, that being the relationship with yourself.
“So many people who are experiencing this dis-connection to who they truly are do not understand about the love that is within us all. Most of us have learnt to look for love and happiness from outside influences, maybe another person or material things. We presume that someone or something is responsible for making us happy. Unfortunately this is a complete fallacy, as your happiness comes from within yourself, because you are naturally happy, just off track, as we sometimes get lost on the way. What does it mean to be true to yourself, you can start living your life, instead of just existing, surrendering, releasing self-doubt and claiming your worthiness? I found this affirmation to be helpful, ‘I release and surrender all unworthiness to the universe, I love and accept myself just as I am.’
“Of course we do tend to blame everything and everyone for our unhappiness, not feeling confident or worthy of receiving love, only learning that this is very negative and limiting. Blame usually goes back to childhood experiences, which I am sure does warrant some of the blame. Personally my parents, brothers and sister have been my teachers on my path of loving and accepting myself .We have the choice of continuing being a victim, feeling sorry for ourselves, or we can start taking responsibility for your lives and actions. I have been blessed with the gift of discipline and motivation and wanting to help myself, if you feel you can draw on those strengths too, it will really support your personal development, where you experience amazing growth in your life. Challenging as this maybe, it will also help you become who you truly are.
“The choice is yours, do you want to stay negative becoming bitter and unhappy, or positive, loving, passionate for your life and how it can be transformed into everything you want it to be. I feel sure you are ready for that change, maybe just by you reading this article. Knowing you are so Worthy of Love. You could start by repeating ‘I am willing to change’.
“That change will take some commitment on your part. When you start to choose positivity and wanting that change in your life, letting go of old patterns and beliefs you have about yourself, then watch this space. You will experience a new awareness and begin to feel and know who you truly are. Please know and remember that there is really no one like you, you are unique, here to live your life’s purpose, no one else’s. Allow the universe to help the abundance flow into your life. Giving and receiving is the balance in life, but we are all outstanding in giving, as receiving is so much more challenging for us, purely due to not loving ourselves and feeling worthy of receiving. So know you are enough and that you do enough, as finding the love you seek, is first finding the love within.
“If you are ready to get on track or maybe back on track which is for some of you, and accept the true you then there are other tools that can help support your change, like meditation. Hopefully the word meditation does not feel like pressure. I feel there is no right or wrong way, just find what suits you. The importance of meditation is when practised it actually quietens the mind, which is key in supporting your growth and healing. Also visualising or imagining what you now want in your life, start to create your own script.
“Another very important exercise is breathing, as it will really help in connecting you to your true self, so practise and practise. All this helps retrain your mind affirmations, and really help in getting your negative thoughts to become positive ones. Never give up, with the strength of your mind and the courage of your soul, you can do it!”