As a single Belle About Town I thought it worth taking a break from pet detecting to look for a two legged friend via the online dating phenomena. This was until I read that 15% of pet owners find their partners while walking their dogs according to petcompare.com
Well this was good news to me as I try and find myself a four legged friend to co-habitat with. But on reflection maybe this wasn’t so good.
I have in the past been the proud owner of two pooches whom didn’t necessarily increase my attractiveness to the opposite sex.
Bailey, an adorable red puppy found on a building site and Wesley, a smart, sparky black and white border collie.
So here I was a young single girl with two handsome escorts to take me round the park. Surely having two dogs would increase my chances of finding the ideal man for me?
Dog beach disaster
It was a stunning day and a particularly handsome man was walking his well groomed dog along the beach. Our eyes met and a small smile was shared. We were both heading in opposite directions, him back to the car park, me to the sea.
We kept walking in our respective directions until I noticed Bailey was no longer around. I felt a sudden wave of fear. Bailey had a very bad habit of trying to go home with other people. Surely he wouldn’t make the mistake with the handsome man?
I turned and swiftly walked back up the sand towards the car park. The closer I got the louder the shouting got.
The vision I saw once reaching the car park was horrifying. My big red dog, soaking wet and covered in sand had squeezed himself into the handsome man’s sports car looking very pleased with himself. Meanwhile the very small well groomed dog had been pushed out and was promptly sitting in a muddy puddle.
No longer did I receive a small smile.
Dog on a hot tin roof
Another event involved Wesley who had no excuse for bad behaviour being blessed with brains. Unfortunately for me he sometimes decided not to use them.
I was working as a vet nurse and took the dogs to work with me. Usually they slept in their baskets not causing any trouble.
As I was helping another handsome man out to the car with his beloved pet we were chatting and joking about how much we loved our pets. It was all very pleasant and he was very nice.
All of a sudden a look of complete horror came over his face. Following his gaze up I saw Wesley happily tip-toeing around the roof of the clinic. Obviously I screamed and started shouting at Wesley doing my very best fish monger’s wife impression.
Spinning around I saw the tail lights of the handsome man’s car driving off in to the distance.
Christmas comes early
It will surprise you to hear I did actually have a boyfriend once. We was lovely and loved the dogs. This was not reciprocated and they tried their best to make his life a misery.
We’d planned to spend Christmas together and he brought over all his perfectly wrapped Christmas presents so we could enjoy our Christmas morning.
I arranged all of his and my presents under a little tree, which I had placed on a table – away from the dogs.
We popped out to have a few Christmas drinks with friends and on our return discovered a number of Christmas presents with rips in the wrapping so that you could tell what each gift was – all belonged to my boyfriend.
So the moral of the story is date online and get a cat.
By Kitty Nine
[picture credits: taliesin]